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my celtic supporting friend in work sent me a link to a celtic article. he's very fair minded, so i expected some gracious, insightful comments about the game.

 

what i got was far better: keeganisms. the guy's a genius.

 

"In some ways, cramp is worse than having a broken leg."

"You get bunches of players like you do bananas...though that is a bad comparison."

"Argentina won't be at Euro 2000 because they're from South America."

"They're the second best team in the world and there's no higher praise than that."

"One of his strengths is not heading."

"He's using his strength. And that is his strength, his strength."

"My father was a miner and he worked down a mine."

"Hungary is very similar to Bulgaria. I know they're different countries..."

"England have the best fans in the world and Scotland's fans are second to none."

"Against France we'll have to be at our best both technically, tactically and spirit-wise."

"You can't do better than go away from home and get a draw."

"We deserved to win this game after hammering them 0-0 in the first half."

"I don't think there's anyone bigger or smaller than Maradona."

"The 33 or 34 year olds will be 36 or 37 by the time the next World Cup comes around, if they're not careful."

"Maine Road was a great football stadium but as time moved on it stayed where it is..."

"Chile have three options - they could win or they could lose."

"Gary always weighed up his options, especially when he had no choice."

"The tide is very much in our court now."

"The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23."

"You don't get two chances at this level, or at any other level for that matter."

"He can't speak Turkey, but you can tell he's delighted."

"Batistuta is very good at pulling off defenders."

"There'll be no siestas in Madrid tonight."

"It's understandable that people are keeping one eye on the pot and another up the chimney."

"England can end the millennium as it started - as the greatest football nation in the world."

"I know what is around the corner - I just don't know where the corner is. But the onus is on us to perform and we must control the bandwagon."

"They compare Steve McManaman to Steve Heighway and he's nothing like him, but I can see why - it's because he's a bit different..."

"The good news for Nigeria is that they're two-nil down very early in the game..."

"Despite his white boots, he has real pace..."

"That would have been a goal if it wasn't saved."

"Goalkeepers aren't born today until they're in their late 2Os or 3Os."

"The substitute is about to come on - he's a player who was left out of the starting line-up today."

"The ref was vertically 15 yards away."

"Football's always easier when you've got the ball."

"It's like a toaster, the ref's shirt pocket. Every time there's a tackle, up pops a yellow card."

"I'd love to be a mole on the wall in the Liverpool dressing room at half-time."

"The game has gone rather scrappy as both sides realise they could win this match or lose it."

"I'm not disappointed - just disappointed."

"There's a slight doubt about only one player, and that's Tony Adams, who definitely won't be playing tomorrow."

"I came to Nantes two years ago and it's much the same today, except that it's totally different."

"We managed to wrong a few rights."

"A tremendous strike which hit the defender full on the arm - and it nearly came off."

"That decision, for me, was almost certainly definitely wrong."

"Danny Tiatto is not going to make a mistake on purpose."

"He'll also be very dangerous from set-pieces. That means he'll be a threat from free-kicks and corners in the final third of the field."

"Shaun Wright-Phillips has got a heart as big as his size, which isn't big, but his heart's bigger than that."

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