26th of foot

Currently, I am in Carcassonne. It's been raining for two days and the wind howls. The l'Aude is in spate and the Canal de Midi is bursting it's banks. I have decided to decamp to the only part of France with expected weather for this time of year, Cote d'Azur. A week in Antibes is the very thing. As Monaco is five minutes up the coast, I thought I would look up wee Craigy. We have a lot in common, both Lanarkshire lads, both former share holders in Rangers, and ............ err, that's it. However, fellow Gersnetters, I am prepared to treat Craig to a salade Nicoise and a glass or two of Provence rose before I offer him a few firm held opinions. If any of the contributors would like me to offer their firmly held opinions to Craig, please chime in. I know, I know, I am frustrated by the poor weather and am attempting to cheer myself up by (brow)beating wee Craigy. I admit it but it would be poor form NOT to take advantage of proximity. Thus, anyone know where Craig's gaffe is in Monaco?

Currently in France and drinking Pelforth. Been in California on several occasions and agree Anchor Steam(Wholefoods in Giffnock stock it) is a tasty beer but I prefer Sierra Nevada Pale Ale and Alaska beer brewed in Juno, seriously refreshing. Attended NARSA in San Francisco 6-7 years past and participated in the march over the Golden Gates bridge, a magnificent sight of celebrating Bears. A couple of guys from the local RSC told me they celebrated Helicopter Sunday by the whole club unloading from the bar on to a cable car, just to do the bouncy on the journey over the hill.

Currently in France and drinking Pelforth. Been in California on several occasions and agree Anchor Steam(Wholefoods in Giffnock stock it) is a tasty beer but I prefer Sierra Nevada Pale Ale and Alaska beer brewed in Juno, seriously refreshing. Attended NARSA in San Francisco 6-7 years past and participated in the march over the Golden Gates bridge, a magnificent sight of celebrating Bears. A couple of guys from the local RSC told me they celebrated Helicopter Sunday by the whole club unloading from the bar on to a cable car, just to do the bouncy on the journey over the hill.

As stated, at the culmination of nine-in-a-row(97), Rangers were £18million in the black. During his tenure at ra Stydome, Big Pierre Van Pink Ribbon was too busy servicing his bhoyfriend, the chef at the Point Hotel, East Kilbride.

Clowns to the left of us, jokers to the right, here we(the support) are, stuck in the middle. I am off to France for a month tomorrow, both the wine and the pastis will be consumed until I achieve a feeling of immense well being.

Like the Rangers Tax Case Blog before, the purpose of Charlotte Fakes is to provide a daily crib sheet for our objective broadcast and print media to chorus from, it has set an agenda and intends to maintain a grip on the ongoing situation. As for identity, I suspect it will be BBC Scotland's Chris McLaughlin as link to Craig Whyte. McLaughlin picks the cherries for broadcast and distributes the rest to fellow Rangers hating cohorts.

Reference the back four, everyone to the right of Lee Wallace must be replaced. Attributes required are commanding and competence.

I'll tell you where the club goes from here, in the immediate short term anyways. Get the fcuking season ticket renewal letters out, like yesterday. At least remove one piece of unnecessary uncertainty.

I am a liberal apolitical type of Bear. Reference Whyte, let's just assemble a firing squad. I will help provide the necessary two minutes training; chamber a round, present the weapon, and squeeze the trigger. Oh, and am prepared to initiate the correspondence to recover the cost of empty cases from his family. If said family cannot meet the cost, I'm all for bayoneting the cnut. Next?

The internecine strife that has plagued our club these last few years, has seen all the main players adopt a pet journo(s) in both broadcast and print media. Getting your side of the story out there fastest and most often is an absolute requirement. Simply, they are all at it. BBC Scotland has proved most adept at continually destabilising our club by constant ridicule of whoevers' hand is on the tiller. After resignation, they go back and put the comforting arm around whatever character and utilise as a source of further mischief. Green is feeling the comfort of Chris McLaughlin at this moment, in a few months time, it will be Malcolm Murray. It is perpetual, the story that keeps on giving.

You missed the game? Poor excuse, unforgiveable.

I was in the Boys' Enclosure that day. DJ's header hit the near post, ran along the line and hit the far post, before big Tam studded the ball over the line. The scene around me was the Bouncy(before the Bouncy had been introduced). Fellow Bears celebrating twice before exploding in relief.

The last time I saw Rangers lift the Reserve League Cup would be almost two decades past. It was a wet and windy evening at old Douglas Park where Rangers triumphed 3-1 after extra time over the Accies. I seem to remember Brian McGinty scored two that night.

I suspect Traynor's job is very much dependent upon who he pays direct responsibility to, ie who is tasking him each day? Further, the amount of incoming at Rangers would not allow him to get his head up and survey the situation. Fifteen years past, Rangers hired the Daily Record's then Chief Political reporter, Paul Sinclair to be Rangers PRO, he lasted less than a year. The Sun's Iain King also spent less than a year as the club's Head of Communications. I suspect Traynor's tenure to be similar.

There should be discounts available to those of us who attended his debut. Sandy was known in those days as, 'Young Billy Jardine'.

My ghast is flabbered. I wonder what will become of his 8%? Let's confirm all those prejudices and appoint David Longmuir.

Peter's pal, Neil has failed to deliver. The baton is now passed to Peter's pal, Stewart.

Aaron Laing's extended family are members of an Easterhouse based CSC entitled, 'the Rocket Launchers CSC'. They are allowed hold their annual POTY dance/dinner at the Walfrid Suite, with their banner tacked to the wall behind their top table. Aaron is a product of his conditioning.

It's a two man, one scene film. Marty Feldman plays Craig Whyte and Andy Serkis reprises his most famous role as Chris McLaughlin. Act 1, Scene 1 : Chris McLaughlin in narrow focus utters, "ah pyoor fcuking hate Rangers". Craig Whyte replies, "ah'm a daftie".

I feel Andy Little has an ability to continually get up the sides of central defenders, his hint of pace over the first 10 yards often gets him away into a finishing position. If we can get a couple of midfielders capable of sliding the ball into those channels, Little may prove as prolific as Jim Forrest. As for Lewis McLeod; well, there can be only one.

As stated above, it was the Board of Scottish Enterprise(Glasgow) that succeeded in bringing the Commonwealth Games to ra Stydome. The expanding cobweb of benefits to ra Sellik has been considerable. The infrastructure around the ground has a new duel carriageway passing within 60-70 yards that links both the M74 and M8 motorways. A new railway station at Dalmarnock(remember free travel on SPT trains and buses are included in ra Sellik season ticket). Further, the Glasgow Underground was meant to be extended to Sellik Park on advice of SPTE CEO, Ron Culley. The Board of Scottish Enterprise(Glasgow) during this period included Wullie Haughey(former Sellik Director), Paul Cooney(former Sellik PRO), Charlie Gordon(GCC Convenor, now an MSP, Sellik supporter), Frank McAveety(GCC Convenor, MSP, now a councillor again), Stephen Purcell(GCC Convenor), Ron Culley(Sellik supporter and SPTE CEO). Specific influence was being brought to bear. Other benefits are massive with the proximity of Sports Scotland with Brigit McConnell at the helm, a velodrome for indoor training, and a state of the art sports science and medical centre. Also, ,let's see what happens after the Games to all that lovely new housing of the Games Village?

The article was stimulated by the appearance of the then First Minister, Jack McConnell on Radio Snyde, hosted by station MD, Paul Cooney. It was the evening of ra Sellik's UEFA cup tie with Liverpool at ra Stydome. Paul Cooney was a member of the Board of Scottish Enterprise(Glasgow). McConnell was on to announce the plans for the Velodrome were ratified and the funding was in place. Further, the Commonwealth Games would be opened and closed at ra Stydome. The relocation of Sports Scotland from Edinburgh to Parkhead was sheer coincidence, ah mean the CEO of Sports Scotland was/is Brigit McConnell(Jack's wife).

The vast majority of that piece was penned by myself some 7-8 years past. It was originally posted on FollowFollow and the thread was prominent for weeks. It is a common error when folks lift the article(and I have no problems with anyone wanting to spread such information) that disbelievingly they change the three streets(Dalriada Street, Kinloch Street, and Janefield Street) sold by the then Glasgow District Council to ra Sellik from the accurate 'one penny' to a pound. It's true, the then Convenor of GDC, Pat Lally was forced to call a full council meeting of all 102 councillors to verify the original decision taken by the Planning Committee. Ra Sellik were allowed to significantly increase their land bank in the immediate proximity to their stadium through the generosity of their supporters on GDC. Both Rangers and Partick Thistle had similar plans lodged with the same Committee to increase their land banks. Rangers had an agreement with Junior club, St Anthonys to purchase their ground for £250,000 and construct a reserve/youth team stadium. Thistle had plans to convert the canal area behind Firhill into a small hotel, leisure, watersports centre. Both these applications were NOT looked on sympathetically by the very same committee, in fact they deliberately stymied these applications.

I note ra Sellik's statement appears to ape US Secretary of State, Cordell Hull's notorious utterance, "he may be a son of a bitch but he is our son of a bitch". The constant failure that is Neil Doncaster has been singled out for unjustified praise. Apparently, his sin is clean. Hull was referring to Rafael Molino Trujillo, the then President of the Dominican Republic. Trujillo was oppressive and corrupt but as long as he facilitated US foreign policy, no pressure was exerted to reform. Neil won't change his behaviour; well, not until His Peterness tells him to do so.

It's forty years since the Centenary Stand was constructed and I find myself wondering if many Bears remember the Derry? The Derry was the piece of terracing situated where the Govan Stand is situated, from the 18 yard line at the Copland to 20 yards after the halfway line. It was truly mental, sang, surged, and thrummed continually throughout a match. I remember a Scottish Cup tie against Falkirk(71/72ish), where a Polis cap was tossed up, down and across the Derry as the match progressed. Against Bayern Munich in the Fairs Cup they sang, 'we sank the Bismark', a game in the sectional League cup they chorused, 'Billy, Billy McNeil' when a stray dog entered the field, and invited all opposition fans, 'to come and have a go if you think your hard enough'. Again, as I wonder; what to an area between the Copland and the Govan known to my grandfather in the 20s/30s as 'Hellfire Corner'? I suppose it proves the Stadium continues to breath and evolve.