Thinker

Das ist nicht das, was ich gehört habe.

If you read up on what Red Bull did to Salzburg, you wouldn't want them anywhere near us.

That's the positive to take here. There was a point where I think we all feared that Gio might crash and burn, but he's steadied the ship and got us moving in the right direction. Postecoglou had a rotten run initially when he took over and so did GVB, it's the form during the rest of the season where they've edged it. The timing of SG's departure certainly didn't help things.

He was raised as one but, credit to him, he chucked it later in life.

Great news for Everton fans.

To have beaten every club currently in the league, it would have to be a former top flight team that is now at the bottom, and has had chance to play and beat Forest Green etc. Oldham, or Bradford?

When I bought my shares in the IPO I considered it a donation rather than an investment - I never had any expectation that I'd make money. What irks me about it isn't that the share price has plummeted, it's that the money we put in was squandered/purloined by the arseholes who were in charge at the time. Still, it all more-or-less worked out in the end when we lifted 55.

Another 10 mg of diazepam for Mr Compo please doctor.

At the moment it is absolutely mental. I recently failed with a bid of 20% over home report for a house in far-from-glamorous Cambuslang. As insane as that sounds, the flat across the close from me recently sold for an even more eye-watering markup, so I'm confident I'd recoup. (Having said that, the increased stamp duty is money down the drain.) If your mate's son is a first time buyer, he might be better to hold off. On the other hand, we've been holding off moving for years and things just keep getting worse!

On a scale of 1-10 for dangerousness, what score would you give Zelensky, and what would you give Putin?

I'm not a fan of this idea, but going by the reactions of others, I'm in one of the low percentiles of pissed-offness. I hate being in the same stadium as their fans. I'm glad we stopped giving them a whole stand at Ibrox, and any excuse to shut them out completely suits me. But I've no intention of going to Sydney, so in that regard this exhibition match makes no difference to me. If others are happy to pay their money for it that's their business. Also, to play devil's advocate, it was a certainty we'd have organised warm weather training during the world cup break, and probably have arranged attendance at an invitational mini-tournament too. That's an expensive business. By agreeing to play them not only is the cost covered, but we'll also get enough money for a signing or two. None of that changes my opinion of Septic or the groin brigade.

No, but it's just a rumour. I could start a rumour that we're getting more money than them if that helps?

The coefficient system for those playoff rounds is contrived even by UEFA standards. No points awarded for the actual results, but we are guaranteed a bonus point for reaching the last 16 proper. We're currently sitting on 9 for the campaign.

There are a few teams in there that are struggling domestically, but I'd love a tie against West Ham. I wonder how they'll handle the Moscow situation.

Apparently he still has an outstanding 6 match touchline ban to serve. Can't remember how he earned it exactly - I expect it was for being a chunt?