Uilleam

Platform 9 and 3/4?

The bottom of the barrel, below the dregs? I didn't quite grasp how pathetic the position was.

These teams represent the four smallest countries in Europe, along with the poorest, which in itself is 'unofficially' split in two: Moldova and Transdnistria. If this is the level of Scottish football, then, really, we are beyond even God's help. I would think that Ross Co would beat any team from any of these countries.

It's Monday morning, so I suppose we may excuse such pessimistic Calvinist gloom. It does seem, from sources various and varied, official/unofficial. mainstream/alternative, that both Walker and Dorrans want to play at Ibrox. Rangers is their team, and the team of their families and friends. They same, of course, was said about Scott Allan, which made his dalliance with the dark side all the more shocking. I do not expect either Dorrans, in particular, or Walker to pitch up at the piggery any time soon. The lesson of the almost deliberate destruction of Allan's career is fresh in the mind. (Before you ask, I have limited, very limited, sympathy, here.) Allan was duped into signing on @la porcherie, his 'capture' engineered to prevent his moving to Ibrox, where he was actually wanted, and would, form and fitness permitting, have featured consistently. You can pull that kind of stunt only once, it seems to me. Fhilth fc , I suspect, has a few bills in the offing, plus demands for better, longer, more lucrative, contracts on the ceo's desk, and thus the cavalier acquisition of players is unlikely to be on its agenda, anyway. Dorrans' move to Rangers would not be for the money, although he would command a very generous salary, in Scottish, SPFL, terms. Walker would, I imagine, increase his money at Ibrox, which is a significant factor. Whether or not it is the sole determinant is a matter for speculation. There is clearly what the press would call a 'Revolution', underway at Ibrox, and this is likely to be an attraction for any properly educated, up and coming ambitious player, particularly if he has, in Caixinha's words " cognitive ability above the Scottish average", and thus would fit in. (If Walker does not, in PC's opinion, have this, then he would not pursue him; I think that much is clear.) So, there are reasons to be, if not cheerful, cautiously optimistic. Signing both, given the assiduous pursuit, would be a real bonus. It is not a make up the numbers game.

You're probably right. I've lost count of the comings; it's just like the old days! Can we look anticipate another loanee? If so, in what position/part of the field?

....And we still don't actually know if he is any good... "Gauld was suggested on loan, but I considered that we should not have more than two loans and in that position we are already covered." Who is the second player on loan that PC mentions? There's Dalcio, and.....

Gibraltar; Luxembourg; Moldova; San Marino; Andorra. God help us, this is the level at which we operate?

Riordan; fingers burnt? Then again, maybe they don't have a cool £Mill........

No, not the referee, let him umpire the match, a timekeeper, with a klaxon, in the stand, like many other team sports, to keep the time, and to signal half time, and full time. The referee could call for 'time outs' , and book players for 'time wasting', although properly implemented changes would mean no advantage accruing to the time waster(s).

I suppose that, once you have established just what "stops the clock", a neutral timekeeper is too simple?

Perhaps not as much as Steve Jobs did......

Dani Alves set to join Manchester City in £5m deal from Juventus https://www.theguardian.com/football/2017/jun/17/manchester-city-dani-alves-junventus Manchester City have approached Juventus over a move for Dani Alves, with Pep Guardiola prepared to offer the Brazil international a two-year contract as he steps up his recruitment drive for next season. City are searching for defensive options after allowing Bacary Sagna and Gaël Clichy to leave when their contracts expire at the end of this month. A move for Tottenham’s Kyle Walker has failed to reach a breakthrough, with Spurs holding out for a fee in excess of £40m for the England international. That has led Guardiola to inquire after Alves, with whom he worked at Barcelona. Juventus have confirmed they could be open to selling a player who especially impressed during the Serie A winners’ run to the Champions League final – notably in the semi-final victory against Monaco, in which he was involved in his side’s first three goals across the tie before scoring the fourth. Alves still has one year left on his contract and City have been told a bid of around £5m would be sufficient to persuade the Turin club to sell the 34-year-old. Despite reports in Spain that a deal has already been agreed, it is understood negotiations are continuing but Alves has agreed a contract in principle to link up with his former manager. Writing on the Players’ Tribune website in the buildup to the Champions League final earlier this month, Alves had high praise for the Catalan, saying: “If you turn the word ‘computer’ backwards, it spells ‘Steve Jobs’. If you turn the word ‘football’ backwards, it spells ‘Pep’. He is a genius. I’ll say it again. A genius."

True: if you play with dumplin's, you are likely to be dragged down to their level, and look a puddin' yourself. I'm less sure about the the opposite.

McKay is a good player, potentially a very good player, with whom it is worth persevering; not indefinitely, and not if he doesn't respond positively; certainly not if he comes the proverbial, or is desirous of slinging his hook. Other things being equal, he strikes me as a player who would be likely to benefit from a technical coach such as Caixinha. The talent is there, the question is whether the mentality -the application, the intelligence, and game intelligence- is, too.

Garner was signed in desperation, and it showed. I cannot fault him for effort and commitment. The important question is whether his departure has, or is likely to have, a significant, negative impact on the side. I think not. On balance, it is good that he departs. I hope that no one will bear him ill will, as he was a trier.

Argentinian defender Federico Allende admits poking opponent with needle https://www.theguardian.com/football/2017/jun/15/argentinian-federico-allende-poking-opponent-needle • Sport Club Pacifico player faces sack for attacking Estudiantes’ Juan Otero • ‘We know we had to make the game dirty, top-division players don’t like it’ Reuters Thursday 15 June 2017 16.00 BST Last modified on Thursday 15 June 2017 16.09 BST An Argentinian fourth-division player is facing the sack after openly boasting that he poked an opponent with a needle during his team’s shock cup win against the top-tier side Estudiantes. Federico Allende, who plays for Sport Club Pacifico in the Federal B championship, said he was inspired by the former Argentina coach Carlos Bilardo, who was reputed to have meted out similar treatment to opponents in his playing days. Allende was marking the Estudiantes forward Juan Otero for most of the Copa Argentina match, which Sport Club won 3-2, and said that he nipped his rival several times. “I had to turn to the great Bilardo,” Allende said in a radio interview. “The poor guy [Otero], it did his head in. But what do you want me to do? We know we had to make the game dirty because top-division players don’t like it. He must have hated me, but that’s football.” Otero confirmed that he was poked four times and that he told the referee, who took no action. “I know it was the game of his life, but it’s still just a football match,” he said. However, the Pacifico president, Héctor Moncada, said Allende’s behaviour had overshadowed his team’s famous win and he would recommend sacking the player. “We are shocked; it’s put a dampener on the team’s work,” he said. Bilardo, who himself was part of a highly successful Estudiantes team in the late 1960s, coached Argentine to World Cup victory in 1986 and the runners-up spot four years later. Personally, I think that the boy was stitched up......

Barcelona: more than a club; indeed, a parcel of whore, rogues and comic singers. I paraphrase from the following article, straight from la boca del caballo. There's some nauseating sycophantic guff about Abu Dhabi Town FC, and Guardiola, which you will have to plough through. Joan Laporta: ‘Barcelona has been kidnapped. It’s hostage to lies and it’s sad’ The former Barcelona president on why the club’s board should resign, why he is certain Pep Guardiola will succeed at Manchester City and the day he feared he might be forced to sell Lionel Messi Joan Laporta says he will stand for election as Barcelona president if the board resign in the near future. Sid Lowe @sidlowe Friday 16 June 2017 12.01 BST Last modified on Friday 16 June 2017 17.15 BST There is a story Joan Laporta tells of the day he called Pep Guardiola to his office and told him he was going to be the new manager of Barcelona, to which Guardiola replied: “You haven’t got the balls.” If there is one thing Barça’s former president never lacked it is balls and yet he does not see it like that, even though José Mourinho wanted the job. Nine years on, it looks the obvious decision; back then, he claims it was obvious too – and he insists Guardiola is also right for Manchester City. “It wasn’t bravery, it was logic,” he says. “And if City back him as he deserves he’ll succeed. He’s an optimist, a winner and he’s brave: he won’t hide.” Laporta sits in his sixth-floor office on Diagonal, the wide, 11km-long avenue that cuts through Barcelona, the day after an event with the Johan Cruyff foundation. “I miss him so much,” he says, “but it’s strange: we all said it’s as if he hasn’t gone.” When Laporta was growing up, he cut his hair like Cruyff, his idol as a player and later a coach. Eventually, they became close. In the presidency and beyond, the Dutchman became his adviser. Cruyff was an ideologue, almost a spiritual guide. Not only to Laporta but to many, especially those at the gathering, Guardiola and City’s director of football, Txiki Begiristain, among them. “Pep looked very well,” Laporta says. “He was here for a few days, so we met up and he was very upbeat. He’s happy at City, optimistic he can build something. The way they plan to go about strengthening the team, I think they’re going to be extremely strong. The fans will be very excited.” There is a pause and a cheeky grin, which there is often with Laporta, always famously good company, and he adds: “I don’t know what they’re going to do, eh!” He continues: “What I do know, and very well, is Pep and Txiki and that they’re capable of building a team that will enthuse people.” At Barcelona, Begiristain was Laporta’s sporting director, Guardiola his coach. “Pep was the perfect fit,” he says. “He knew the club, the style, we’d seen how hard he worked with the B team, he’d played at every level, been at Wembley [in 1992]. I’ve never thought what could have been with Mourinho: it was always Pep I wanted. We’re all sons of the Dream Team. 1973 was glorious: I was 11 and this Dutchman turned up and revolutionised Barça, revolutionised a country. Then he returned as coach. We inherited that. There are other ways to play but we have our way – and it’s Cruyff’s and Guardiola’s and Txiki’s … “Becoming coach was [just] the next step for someone capable of anything, because he has so much charisma and extraordinary intelligence. It was a good decision, we were sure, but he achieved beyond our expectations. We thought Pep would win something; he won everything.” Guardiola’s first league game was a defeat at tiny Numancia in 2008. “Hostia,” Laporta whispers: bloody hell. “There was a lot of pressure and that day united everyone against us. They said: ‘You haven’t learned anything, you’re just a bunch of teenagers.” By the end of the season, though, Barcelona had won the treble beating Real Madrid on route. “On the day of the Comunidad de Madrid, 2 May,” Laporta recalls, grinning again. Sitting in the directors’ box, he contained himself but he was fit to burst. “The regional president was there, dressed in white; the president of the government; the ex-president … and you win 6-2 and Puyol kisses the Catalan flag on the captain’s armband. Imagine it!” You can imagine Laporta in a suit but with Catalan boxer shorts hidden below. “The estelada [independence flag],” he jokes, pointing out the window to one hanging across the Diagonal. “People say don’t mix sport and politics but they’re already mixed. Those who say they don’t mix politics and football, do. A club needs soul; winning makes you proud and if that pride is for a city or country it’s greater. You’re not just playing to win. The ends don’t justify the means. One of the things I was most proud of was putting Unicef on the shirt. It gave the club soul; it engaged us with society, especially the vulnerable. You play for something else. And if a team shares the values of its place, that’s the most romantic ideal. Pep fielded 11 homegrown players one day and six of ours won the World Cup [for Spain] in South Africa. They’ll never recognise that. Maybe that’s why they don’t want to give us our referendum [on independence].” Laporta is laughing again. “Shit, maybe that’s it.” The problem is that when it comes to City, none of that context applies; the conditions Guardiola faces are different on almost every level. Is the model really for export? Can the identity be the same, not least as City are a private business with Middle Eastern ownership? Do they need an English core, just as Barcelona had Catalans? Build an identity, seek a “soul”, sure, but how? “Do you want me to tell them? I do consultation,” Laporta says, laughing. There is a moment, before talk turns specifically to City, when Laporta notes some clubs “don’t have a single player from their own country”, describing that as “risky, because you can lose your identity”, but now he adds: “We’ve always said anyone who lives in Catalonia is Catalan and you can apply that to Manchester. City have players from round the world but they’re still citizens. The key is to make them proud of that; ultimately the soul of the club is in its feelings, which are transmitted to the players. “It’s not about players being English, necessarily, more about connecting with fans. We worked hard on the youth system, developing players at home, who give you that identity, and that’s an idea Pep, Txiki and Ferran [soriano, City’s CEO] share. “Pep’s record speaks for itself,” Laporta continues. “Everywhere has its idiosyncrasies. He knew Barcelona as a kid but was successful at Bayern and I’m convinced he will be at City. He’s lucky to work with Txiki and Ferran, who trust him. That’s peace of mind. When I saw Pep he was animated, enthusiastic, excited for the future. He’s smart, has emotional intelligence, an ability to convince. It’s not easy: the Premier League’s a challenge and there are two great teams in the city but he’s the world’s best coach and could’ve gone anywhere. He chose City because they’d have the faith, letting him build the project he has in mind. I’m very Cruyffista but what Leo does – and I talked about this a lot with Johan – makes him the best in history “He’ll make his mark. If you watch City last season they passed the ball well but it doesn’t happen overnight. You need the right players. They’ll bring in players who suit the system he wants, which doesn’t have to be identical to Barça. He’s intelligent, he’ll adapt. He’ll create an identity, a connection. The philosophy will be controlling possession, the first defender being the striker, pressing. When they came here , yes, they lost but had it not been for some mistakes … they made life difficult for us. Very. He’s only just arrived: now, let his imagination run, let things flow, and City fans are going to enjoy their football.” But it is not only context; it is content too. The other thing Guardiola does not have, of course, is the player he most needs: Lionel Messi. “Don’t give him ideas,” Laporta jokes but he has no doubts over the Argentinian’s future with a contract renewal imminent. As president, there was only one moment he feared Messi departing and that has long gone. “It was 2006 when Inter made an offer,” he explains. “They were prepared to pay the €150m buyout clause, which is why we [later] raised it to €250m, but I always felt reassured by my relationship with his dad, Jorge. “I told him: ‘They’ll have to pay the clause because I won’t sell. He’ll be happy here, he’ll get glory. There, he’ll only win financially. Your son’s destined to be the greatest in history and here he’ll have a team to help get there. He’ll enjoy it.’ “I’m very Cruyffista,” Laporta continues, “but what Leo does – and I talked about this a lot with Johan – makes him the best in history. Johan said so too. Messi’s football is beautiful and effective. For me the best ever are Cruyff, Maradona and Messi. Leo’s a mix of Cruyff and Maradona but he is Leo Messi. “Of course he could do it in England. He has a gift. He could do it covered in mud in the pouring rain. He has done it. He’s played in England and been spectacular, he adapts to any circumstance, any conditions. And I love the fact he enjoys himself and never complains, never dives. Yet he has character, eh: it’s a mistake for opponents to forget that. It happened at the Bernabéu: the moment they hit him [Marcelo split Messi’s lip], that was it. Grrr and off he went. “He’ll stay,” Laporta laughs again. “So, the big challenge Pep has is to achieve the same as he did here … only without Messi. “Leo is just fine where he is at Barça and Pep will triumph with City. For sure. And he’ll deserve even more credit, because if you have a player like Leo success comes more easily. Pep says it too: forget all the stories, ‘this’ or ‘that’, if Leo’s right then, relax, everything’s in hand, we’ll win. He is a destroyer of tactics and does it beautifully.” Joan Laporta, pictured with Lionel Messi after extending the player’s deal and increasing the buyout clause in 2009, says: ‘Of course he could do it in England. He has a gift. He could do it covered in mud in the pouring rain.’ So, that is Messi’s future sorted. What about Laporta’s? It is two years since he stood for election, losing out to Josep Maria Bartomeu. The divisions remain unhealed – in fact they have deepened – and much has happened. There is the sponsorship from Qatar, declining fortunes and a club Laporta believes is losing its identity. The former president Sandro Rosell, who gave way to Bartomeu, his vice-president, is in jail accused of money-laundering; Messi has been convicted of tax evasion; and the Neymar signing has brought them to court. Laporta has been in court too, where he was exonerated. The current board pursued him, seeking to hold him personally responsible for alleged losses during his mandate but the ruling favoured him. “I can’t forget that those who followed me tried to destroy me,” he says. “We left them the greatest Barça in the club’s history and they spent their time destroying it. Pep had the rare courage to publicly defend us. “Barcelona has been kidnapped. It’s hostage to the intoxication, manipulation and lies [of this board], and it’s sad. I’m demanding they resign. What they did to us was shameful; they accused us of mismanagement, brought an action against us and tried to force us pay €79m for ‘losses’. Now it’s been proven, seven years later, that they were wrong. It’s a scandal. If they had any shame they’d resign; if they had any shame, they’d have gone when they did a deal with the public prosecutor to make the club, not them, liable in the Neymar case. “If they resigned now, I’d definitely stand [for election],” Laporta says. He would have to go without Guardiola. “And without Cruyff,” he adds, swiftly. “He was a great source of advice for me, so if I did go back I’m sure I’d suffer a kind of vertigo not having him alongside me. We’d feel like something was missing. But we’ve learned so much from him that deep down he’d still be guiding us. “The problem is [the current board’s mandate] ends in 2021. If they went now, I’d stand. But if they continue for three, four years, I don’t think so. We all have our moment. Right now, it’s still fresh to me, but if it goes on longer, I’d like a candidate I can look at and think: ‘Yes, this is the one’. Renewal’s always necessary. I’d like someone with clear ideas, a model I can share, a person I can trust.” Someone such as Gerard Piqué, say, the defender who has publicly expressed his ambitions for the presidency. “If he learns about running a club, he has more than enough ability and charisma and I’d vote for him for sure,” Laporta says. “Or maybe the future of Barcelona one day is Pep as president and Xavi as coach. Why not?” https://www.theguardian.com/football/2017/jun/16/joan-laporta-barcelona-board-resign-pep-guardiola-lionel-messi

The Independent is all over this story, today. http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/transfers/cristiano-ronaldo-real-madrid-transfer-leave-exit-tax-twins-girlfriend-a7793711.html Cristiano Ronaldo may not get his Real Madrid exit, but he's angry enough about damage to his image to try Analysis: This isn't the first time Ronaldo has tried to leave Madrid and it may not be the last, but the anger is very real Ed Malyon Sports Editor @eaamalyon 3 hours ago2 comments The Independent Football Cristiano Ronaldo has had unprecedented success with Madrid, but now he wants out UEFA via Getty Cristiano Ronaldo has told Real Madrid that he wants to leave the club, a decision that has been described as “irreversible.” And what this all comes down to, if you believe those closest to Real Madrid, is something that is “irreparable” – the Portuguese’s reputation after being denounced by Spain’s tax authorities for allegedly defrauding them to the tune of €14.7m. Anyone with eyes, and even most of those without, will be aware of how conscious Ronaldo has always been of his image. Now, after what has been the most successful 12 months of his career, his name is set to be dragged through the mud as this tax case rolls on and on. Cristiano Ronaldo makes 'irreversible' decision to leave Real Madrid This is the price you pay for worldwide fame. If you do something (or are even just accused of doing something) then the whole world will know about it. Think of the books, the weird movie and the expertly-curated social media platforms documenting Ronaldo’s life… it is a form of controlling what the world thinks of you which is utterly destroyed by revelations such as these. Ronaldo has tried to leave clubs before. He’s even tried to leave Real Madrid before – twice – and one would dare say this won’t be the last, with another hermetically-sealed, perfectly stage-managed tantrum just around the corner when he turns 34. Both previous times he tried to get out of Madrid the basic reasoning came down to Cristiano feeling the club didn’t do enough for him or value him enough. They didn’t treat him like Lionel Messi, who received Barcelona’s full backing at all times, even when found guilty of tax fraud. But there was a noticeable shift from Madrid after that. They were trying. There was clamour for Ronaldo to win the Ballon d’Or and then adulation when he did. Madrid’s fans have been very tolerant of Cristiano’s flare-ups, talking about how “sad” he was with the club, and then the private meetings with Paris Saint-Germain in the 2015/16 season. But even that is not enough for the 31 year old who, we now understand, had taken this decision even before Cardiff’s Champions League final. The hardest bit was keeping it quiet. It is also worth noting that on every previous occasion Cristiano Ronaldo has tried to leave Real Madrid, he has ended up getting a better contract and more money. That might be the play again, and it would be remiss to not mention that Lionel Messi’s contract should be announced soon and it will take the Argentinean back above Ronaldo in terms of salary. Does that matter? It shouldn’t at the level these two earn at but, once again, it is the image that appears to be important here rather than the pounds and pennies. “CR7 is deeply disillusioned with the whole situation raised in the country by the tax authorities and considers himself ‘a victim of persecution,’” say A Bola. But persecution barely seems right. Ronaldo is not being pursued over small amounts of money but a shortfall of nearly €15m. Lionel Messi was sentenced to 21 months in jail for less than a third of that amount (but will never spend a night behind bars because sentences under two years are nearly always suspended in Spain). Yet that brings into stark focus the trouble Cristiano Ronaldo might be finding himself in. After the year he has had – winning the Champions League, European Championships, Club World Cup, La Liga and Champions League again – this could have proven to be the successful winding down of one of the greatest-ever football careers. Instead there’s a fresh, lingering stain that no amount of hat-tricks or haircuts can rub off. Real Madrid will let him calm down, hoping this is just a momentary calentón that passes. They could offer to pay his fines, should they arrive, but there is little else they can do for a man with nearly five years left on his contract. Manchester United and Paris Saint-Germain may be standing by but they are Jorge Mendes pawns in these scenarios. Neither have any control of the situation except to watch and wait… and hope. That A Bola last week reported an upcoming €180m bid for Cristiano Ronaldo is important because it is where the trail begins. This morning’s revelations that the 31-year-old superstar has told Real Madrid he wants to leave is just the next stage, a signpost on the path to resolution. For now, nobody knows what that resolution will be. But with a Confederations Cup full of media opportunities to make his side of the story known, Cristiano Ronaldo holds much of the power but not the leverage. Keep in mind that image is everything, "irreversible" is nothing.

CR5? Are you sure that the Pedro has agreed that with him?

He came second, man, second, in the (insert superlative) league in the world. OK, he did 'inherit' Luis Suarez, Sturridge managed more or less a full season, and when his luck ran out.....

By denying that you and he are one and the same, you are saying that you are none of these things.............

Brenda to the Saints; McInnes to the fhilth. You heard it here 1st.

Has anyone ever seen Frankie and Richard Wilson in the same room, at the same time? No smoke without fire........

Cristiano Ronaldo makes 'irreversible' decision to leave Real Madrid after treatment by Spanish tax authorities Caceria de bruja.... ....and we all know who would benefit, if this came to pass....... No point in the lad coming to Rangers, as the Barrowfield Barca would have him harassed by the authorities even more severely than their pyor speshull sanctimonious friends on the Med. Cristiano Ronaldo makes 'irreversible' decision to leave Real Madrid after treatment by Spanish tax authorities The Portuguese captain is being accused of defrauding the taxpayer of nearly €15m Ed Malyon @eaamalyon 42 mins ago0 comments The Independent Football http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/transfers/cristiano-ronaldo-real-madrid-transfer-news-wants-to-leave-spanish-tax-fraud-allegations-a7792826.html Ronaldo is furious with the treatment of him by Spanish tax authorities Cristiano Ronaldo wants to leave Real Madrid, according to reports in his native Portugal, in a decision that has been described as "irreversible". The 31-year-old former Manchester United winger is reportedly angry at his treatment by Spanish tax authorities and wishes to leave the country, according to the front page of Portuguese daily A Bola on Friday. Ronaldo is the subject of a lawsuit brought by Spanish prosecutors over tax that they believe he should have paid on image rights income. The winger is being accused of defrauding nearly €15m from the taxpayer. Real Madrid issued a statement fully supporting the player, claiming they were "absolutely convinced of his innocence." The Portuguese legend this month won his third Champions League as a Madrid player, and fourth of his career, but is so "indignant" at what he feels amounts to persecution that he is ready to walk away, and has communicated that decision to Florentino Pérez, the Real Madrid president. A Bola recently also claimed that Ronaldo would be the subject of a €180m bid this summer, suggesting this outcome may have been in the pipeline for some time. Paris Saint-Germain have been long-term admirers of the Madeira-born star and held a number of secret meetings with him over a transfer during the 2015/16 season. Club president Nasser El-Khelaifi would jump at another chance to sign Ronaldo, even if there were suggestions he leveraged PSG's interest to boost the multi-million euro contract extension he signed last year. Manchester United, too, would be keen on bringing Ronaldo back to Old Trafford. Ed Woodward remains obsessed by star appeal and signing football's biggest individual brand would tick every box as United look to return to being title challengers. With the collapse of their move for Antoine Griezmann and Andrea Belotti proving too expensive, Ronaldo could be the perfect tonic for United even if it is hard to imagine a scenario where Ronaldo decided to leave Madrid and United hadn't already been informed.

You can never please a Catalan. (Old Spanish proverb)