Pacific Quay Musings?

[ian1964 10,409]

 

[Gonzo79 13,585]

A literal Timplosion perhaps?

[Uilleam 5,409]

10-in-a-row going up in smoke?

 

Or is it merely a signal re: rasellik's new manager?

 

 

 

[26th of foot 5,828]

Cosgrove has spontaneously combusted.

 

The initial flicker began in his ego and flamed into his copious bile.

 

I am rawking DrStu's Irvine Welsh explanation from yesterday and I am sure he'll understand when I employ, "Comedic Exaggeration"? I will be in attendance at PQ within the hour, selling cups of accelerant and bags of marshmallows - £5 a pop.

[Uilleam 5,409]

23 minutes ago, 26th of foot said:

Cosgrove has spontaneously combusted

Disappointing news:

I rather hoped that he had donned the saffron robes, and immolated himself with petrol, as a protest against Agent Orange.

 

 

[Franc Ergs 1,351]

[26th of foot 5,828]

Storm Alfredo.

 

These last several years, the Meteorological Offices in the UK, Ireland, and the Netherlands have an agreement to use the same name for large scale cyclonic wind storms. It alternates between male and female names, utilising 21 letters of the alphabet. Apparently, the result is far more people in these countries now take greater interest in the mostly unpredictable life expectancy of storms. Often, they begin out at sea, gathering energy before hitting landfall, where the kinetic energy begins to discharge.

 

In Scottish football these last few years, we have a perma-storm that has become most predictable. It begins on a Parks team coach driven by Jimmy Bell, and is discharged regularly at Scottish football grounds. Watching the energy dissipate has become a familiar choreography, and such familiarity has bred contempt. It doesn't matter the provocation, it doesn't matter the circumstance, and it doesn't matter the prevailing conditions. No mitigation can be accepted. The select grouping that is Scottish football storm watchers much prefer it this way.

 

The contemptuous NEVER tell us, certainly NEVER highlight Porteous wiping out Morelos in the first minute, or Scott McKenna running his studs down his calf, or Scott Brown slapping the back of his neck. The Columbian being pelted by coins and scalding drinks to a backdrop of painted bedsheets in guttural Spanish proclaiming his Mother to be a whore, are quickly glossed over. The storm watchers are impatient to get to the end of every Storm Alfredo because they know it ends with another episode of fast track justice, resulting in another multi-game ban. In many ways, BBC Scotland's Michael Stewart is the epitome of such particular observation, "I'm sick and tired of Morelos and the Rangers manager defending his actions".

 

Steven Gerrard is correct, the Buffalo's actions at Easter Road were indefensible, he has been handed a further three match suspension. Similarly, Gerrard was correct to highlight consistency. Remember Dundee United's Ryan Edward's straight legged studding of Morelos at Ibrox? It resulted in a ten pence size puncture wound on the Columbian's upper thigh, no card awarded, no foul awarded either, game restarted with a drop ball. Michael Stewart completely agreed with the Referee's actions. It's about posterity with Mikey, he is playing his part to ensure nothing remains of Morelos injustice.

 

The storm watchers know Alfie is a free hit. Irvine Welsh has not lived in Scotland for quarter of a century. Dublin, New York, Chicago, ..... etc are his homes. He returns to Caledonia's craggy majesty for drug dealer's funerals and the occasional Hibee game. He was a guest on David Tanner Hosted Hibs TV and gave more energy to the storm, he wanted Alfie macheted into pieces and distributed to the corners of the globe. He also referred to Morelos as, "a sticky bun". Step forward Stuart Cosgrove, big mate of Irvine. DrStu' does not refer to the sticky bun remark, again posterity. However, he is consistent with his 'not getting Rangers supporters standing on the sidelines raging and beeling'. Irivine's machete comment was, "comedic exaggeration" and Rangers supporters complaining to OffCom are stupid(for posterity) because Hibs TV broadcasts via the world wide web.

 

Today, Scott Brown's flying elbow into the face of Killie's Tshibola has been cited for further consideration. Has Gerrard sparked a storm of consistency? Michael Stewart was first in, on last night's Sportscene, he noted Tshibola had to lower his head to receive Brown's elbow and the reality was, "Scott was just fending him off". Remember, Mikey was not sure Brown was worthy of a red card at Livi' either. 

 

I hope this is the start of a Club attempt to cap this particular storm. Posterity is a long time. 

[Gonzo79 13,585]

10 minutes ago, 26th of foot said:

Irvine Welsh has not lived in Scotland for quarter of a century.  He returns to Caledonia's craggy majesty for drug dealer's funerals and the occasional Hibee game.

He also returns to save BAME people from the horrors of colonialist statues.  A white saviour, if you will.

 

11 minutes ago, 26th of foot said:

Michael Stewart was first in

Why is such a partisan, bit-part, bitter failed politician and ex-footballer allowed to have so much influence on those who govern our national sport?

[Uilleam 5,409]

17 minutes ago, Gonzo79 said:

Why is such a partisan, bit-part,bitter

Answered yourself, there, guv.

Edited February 3, 2021 by Uilleam

[26th of foot 5,828]

Goodfellas.

 

Martin Scorsese's masterpiece, 'Goodfellas' has a particularly powerful scene when Tommy De Vito(Joe Pesci) is about to be elevated to the status of, 'Made Man'. He is replete in his Sunday best, about to enter the business front premises and remarks,"the books will be opened for a shoeshine boy". It's not just Tommy experiencing excitement, both his long term friends, Henry Hill( Ray Liotta) and Jimmy Conway(Robert De Niro) realise the potential benefits of being associated with a Made Man. They wait in a Diner for the confirmatory telephone call and in a ten second montage, emotions erupt .............

 

The ambience inside the PQ Gang Hut has been sombre of late. Prayers for Neil are not being heard, Peter has taken his hand off the tiller of Scottish football, and treasured dismembered member, Michael Stewart left Sellik TV in late Autumn. Party hats are discarded, the streamers and balloons hang limp amid the still, rancid air. However, today's announcement from the Chamber of Secrets has stimulated agitation. One of their own is about to be made up and all members can share the benefits.

 

Sellik TV have announced changes in the line up, former Radio Snyde front man, Peter Martin is no longer doing commentary. Another Radio Snyde front man, Gerry McCulloch is moving from Hosting duties to providing commentary, and Gang Hut associate, Creepy Connie McLaughlin is the new Host of ra Sellik TV. Now, Connie rawking her inner buzz, will bring a new reality. Last month, Gerry told us the SPFL Premiership table was "fake news"; I don't know if Connie will be courageous enough to challenge Gerry's reality? I suspect her hardest decision will be to inform her brother, Chris that she has secured the gig. 

 

As the fireworks explode above PQ and the Gang Hut chorus Hail, Hail; spare a thought for calamitous Chris. Only last year, his squeeze, Eilidh Barbour left him for a Sky female golfing colleague. Apparently, Chris did not have feet big enough to fill the spikey shoes? Further, Chris's bi-weekly appointment with Peter's cheese will soon be confined to warm nostalgia. Let's hope Connie and Eilidh are not sharing a beard? It would be too much.

 

As emotions erupt in the Gang Hut, those listening carefully will hear Chris screaming, 'it should have been me'.