26th of foot

Peter McDougall invented a wonderfully indicative character to represent the Port, Clatty Bella had the best line in, 'Just a Boys' Game'. Jake and Dancer escape the torrential rain by entering the close of Clatty's flat. Drookit, they chap her door and whilst crossing the threshold inquire after the provision of a towel? Clatty replies, "Naw, ma boay's gone tae the swimming wae it". Such brevity?

A young lady named Clatty Bella from the Gallowgate is anxious to meet you.

Peter has organised a post season trip to Japan for commercial reasons and, he wants to see the Cherry Blossom in late April-early May.

I demand every Rangers player subject themselves to remedial training with particular emphasis on sticking their legs out.

You are correct, in the last couple of seasons the amount of important goals lost to opposition cross balls is undeniable. The Europa Cup final, last season's League Cup final and Scottish Cup semi-final and, this season's Champions League qualifier against PSV home and away. The Europa Cup final equaliser is most frustrating, why did we NOT stop the cross coming in?

I suspect the first half will be difficult, the pitch will be sticky and will soon churn. The soggy pitch is the same for both teams, I want professional application tonight. Dessers is a tall, strong running lad. He must stand up and take the hits. Score first, second and, third; put yourselves on easy street.

Dumbarton 0 Rangers 4 FGS : Dessers.

I have identified you. You are Angry Anderson of Rose Tattoo.

Forty years past in the wake of the Falkland Conflict, Mrs Thatcher's Government wanted to surf the feel good wave by promoting KAPE(Keep the Army in the Public Eye). They came up with Executive Stretch, a long weekend of middle to senior management from well known companies to participate in a 30 K slog. Mixed groupings of eight Bankers, Accountants, Lawyers, ....... etc from Lloyds Bank, ICI, Honeywell, .... etc were accompanied by both an Officer and senior NCO on a TAB course consisting of kayaking, orienteering, abseiling and culminating on an Assault Course. The first one was based at Garelochhead and the course straddled three lochs and Glen Douglas. Considerable military support was available reference shelter/sleeping, rations and, provision of necessary kit. I believe the idea was to increase understanding on both sides of pressures and demands? We were requested to submit general reports on both the organisation and conduct. I complied suggesting it should be scaled back considerably; a wander and a couple of lunches could achieve the same communication. I received the companies suggestions, they wanted it tougher and demanded individual reports. I was not prepared to offer career defining reports and most others agreed. The entire concept was handed over to the TA and ran for a further several years. It was a recipe for serious injury and disaster.

The entire spectrum should be available : Weddings, Funeral Purveys, bar mitzvahs, children birthday parties, stag-dos, hen nights ........................... the burning of Spiers.

We can provide transparency but it will cost you.

Climb aboard the Subway and alight at Copland Road.

Ibrox.

the man behind the wire.

I believe the Rangers - Vorwarts Berlin tie in the European Cup is our anomaly. The Berlin wall was constructed in 1961 and the political implication was the Government refused Visas to the East Germans to visit Ibrox. A neutral venue had to be found and an agreement was reached with Malmo in Sweden. The game failed to take place on the Wednesday evening because Malmo was fog bound. Rescheduled for the next morning at 10am, Rangers ran out 4-1 winners and, 6-2 on aggregate. Due to the circumstances above, I believe the Rangers - Vorwarts Berlin program is akin to hens teeth?

The Senior Football Writer at the Herald is Graeme McGarry, a Claret and amber man. However, Graeme has endured a dozen years of Peter conditioning and these days can be relied upon to behave in full useful idiot mode. Peter put something inside him. Today, Graeme has penned a puff piece with the help of Uri Levy, the only Israeli Journo who exclusively covers Palestinian football. Who brought Graeme and Uri together? Anyways, Graeme is once again most sympatheTIC to Stade de Gadd concerns over Lil Abada. The support ie the Green Brigade are anti-Semitic eg constant haranguing of both Nir Bitton and Ian Livingston and, now warning Abada not to display his Israeli heritage. Graeme has been selected to remind the Herald readership and Abada that Sellik are open to all. Now, we suffer the slings and arrows, the barbs often laced with vile sectarianism. However, the placemen work hard utilising euphemisms such as, 'rivalry' and, 'cheeky'. I propose we engage with cheeky rivalry and accepting our need for a pacy forward, let's offer Lil Abada a new more welcoming home. An end of season loan deal with an option to buy should suffice.

I believe Peat and Diesel are eulogising, 'the Hochmagandy Cup' on their next album. Come on Boydie light my byre.

Jum Spence has been awfy quiet these days.

Aye, a Saguaros Cactus. Both the Saguaros and Sam stand tall with arms outstretched. I would argue the Cactus possessed greater mobility?

Well, Sam has gone. I wish him all the best at Utrecht and I am positive it is best for all concerned should the deal be made permanent. I was intending to inquire on the heading to the sunshine thread, if Sam was on the aircraft? It was the Aris Limassol game where I realised Sam reminded me of one of those Spanish waiters of old. A Manuel character, the very second you raised your hand to summon, he would turn and head off in the opposite direction. Sam had the same relationship with the ball. Oh, the Spanish hospitality's trade's loss is Utrecht's gain.

"I have just returned from a festive trip to the Emerald Isle", says RAB Cosgrove. "Oh dearie me", says Tam the Token. Above are the two opening statements from the cohosts of Saturday's Off the Ball show. RAB continues his immersion into the warm waters of Orishness allowing resolutions of never being confronted by a Twinings tea bag and expressing a new found love for Gaelic sports only rivalled by further love for bearded avuncular Irish men. RAB radiates plastic Paddy to please the good friends of the show. An Irish Passport will be next? Tam's opener was the entry to that VAR non-decision on the 30th December'22 at Sellik Park. Tam and RAB are fed up with a constant week long discourse on Nick Walsh and Willie Collum then, proceed with a thirty minute long analysis. The synopsis is thus, Rangers had a point and held the moral high ground. The tipping point was to personalise the event by demanding Willie Collum no longer officiates games involving aRangers. I agree, Rangers over egged a rancid pudding, the demands on Collum proved no limit of exploitation had been considered in the club appreciation. Both continued with extrapolation, no refereeing officials and families should face threats and the personalisation will lead to another Referees strike, "Celtic fans caused the first referees strike, Rangers fans will cause the next, it will be one-one". These two clowns are forever chastising those pundits that criticise supporters who invade pitches or throw snowballs claiming they could be carrying weapons or including grenades in the thrown objects because; fans do not carry chainsaws or grenades. Here, they extrapolate to a referee strike because it is their preferred prejudice. There is no referee strike and there will not be one thus, I disagree. Now, if the PQ Gang Hut want to have a discussion or a documentary on the Referee strike that did happen, then I am all ears. Peter will not allow it. Anyways, Tam ends with another, "JFK moment". He tells of being in the Spar on the Isle of Arran when hearing a report of Rangers conceding a penalty against Killie. RAB emotes another well rehearsed faux guffaw. I wonder does RAB travel and declare his faux guffaws when visiting his considerable property portfolio? Is he a faux guffaw smuggler? It extrapolated in a PQ Gang Hut sense, when Kenny Macintyre appeared at One O'Clock to preview Sportsound, Tam could not resist another dig. Earlier in the week, a caller to the Jeremy Vine show made front page headlines, he bellowed, "F the Pope and the IRA" down the line. The faux guffaw began as Tam said, "Happy New Year Kenny, I have not heard you since you called Jeremy Vine during the week"? The shows guests, Conneach Macleod and Lubna Kerr chorused guffaws with RAB. It is most useful to have the occasional Rangers supporter on the show. Talking of guests, before the festive period we had Marc Jennings and BBC Scotland staffer, Paul English. Both are Sellik supporters. Over the weekend last we were served up Conneach and Lubna, both Sellik supporters. On Sunday, it was Paddy Duffy .......... what is the point? Conneach Macleod let the cat out the bag, he was on to promote his Hebridean Bakery tomes; however, he declares he was Sellik's Commercial Manager for five years them, seven years at the SFA, ......... ah dae whit Peter tells me. As Tam said, "oh dearie me" and the supporters of Scotland's other 41 senior professional clubs are NOT guffawing.

Yep, Prawg Rawk will do that to you. Thumping Pumping Horney Horns Loyal RSC.

Rangers B drew Wrexham in the quarter-finals of the Challenge Cup four-five years past and battered the leeks three-zip at Ibrox. How times change.

Seems fair, particularly since the rest of the team having been carrying Sam for the first half of the season.

Fairs Cup, September'70. We lost 0-1 to Bayern in most controversial circumstances. The Ref' awarded an indirect free kick, Gerd Muller struck the ball into the net without anyone else touching it. Thus, no goal; however, the Ref' awarded a goal.