amms

I've got you in with the 'big brand' sheep for some reason, you'll need to come out and declare your love for the 'diamond' publicly Zappa.

I disagree, you can get the England top and the Man City top pretty much everywhere, as with all things in retail it's down to demand. Unfortunately outside of our natural heartlands there isn't a great demand for our strip, the internet of course means anyone can buy our strip wherever they are. Now when are you going to show me a nice Nike kit that's not a decade old?

I did. I'd hoped you didn't.

I'm hurt. The fact that you, Kuznetsov and Amokachi are struggling to produce any evidence of your perversion for foreign designed dry-fit, wicking, polyester over proper British designed fitba tops is troubling, thats all. I see it as my duty to push you on this, it's for your own good, you've been brainwashed. Umbro are clearly the superior football strip company, it's important you see the error of your ways. However, you need to come over to the light of your own volition, I can't drag you here, I can only point the way and pat your head on the way past. It's for your own good.

Why does Bob Downes name ring a bell?

I'm wise to you, a professionals trick if every I saw one. Get a great looking model so that we're distracted from the actual top, nice try Tom Ford but I'm not falling for it.

It's okay, no better. Diagonal stripes are spoiling the top but the shorts are nice, it's a B strip, no better. Is that your best offering?

Gentlemen this shouldnt be as hard as it seems to be proving. Just show me a 'cool' strip, not one that's 12 years old or based on a 60s sci-fi show. Umbro maybe the choice of the jake these days but I need evidence for these choices you think you are making of your own free will. It's like an advertisers dream here, you seem to know what's 'hip' but you don't know why. So c'mon, educate this old timer, show me a strip you like.

Mmm, I mean it's better than Barcelona but that wouldn't be hard, but lets be honest about where their inspiration is coming from, I mean look at that collar!

Nimmo fills nobody with confidence.

Actually it could be argued it was.

Kappa? Zappa I need examples, don't just sling brand names at me willy-nilly, show me your workings please.

Hang on. I've just realised that Nike make the Celtic strip. Green and white hoops are against the laws of nature, they are just simply wrong, you don't need to be Yves Saint Laurent to know that. Half mad Irish monks who could not possibly have conceived colour television or replica tops can be excused for inflicting that colour and style combination on the world. But Nike, Nike have managed to take something that is a crime against fashion and make it worse, how is that possible? What kind of mind looked at the Celtic strip and thought 'I know what that needs; it needs more hoops'? No, I'm sorry, Nike should make shoes and basketball hoops (aha, the inspiration perhaps!), they shouldn't be allowed near association football. Behave.

Is this a wind-up?

You have to be joking?

I'm looking for actual examples please. I'm old, show me pictures.

So what's the cutting edge now, what strips are considered 'cool' these days?

Is this a generational thing I wonder. For me Umbro are the football strip brand. I really like the current strip and the last one too, must be the retro thing appealing to my ageing sense of, ahem, style. Adidas were football too but mucked about with athletics and effeminate things like that, plus they made bags and t-shirts, how can you take that seriously. Everyone else is just an arriviste. Still my favourite strip of all time I reckon -

They are very good, thanks for highlighting them. Some things should not be allowed to lie.

The more I think about what happened to Black the angrier I get about it. What kind of a fuckwit boos his own player before he's even kicked a ball? Everyday you just despair a bit more for the state of the game in this country.

It wasn't Esplin who made it though, was it? Surely he is just reporting what the 'Tartan Army' guy said or am I misreading it?

Surely witholding the money from Rangers last season will be challenged by a creditor, why would Ticketus or HMRC agree to this?

Okay, I've completed my first draft, where do you want it? Should I PM it to someone (Andy, Zappa?) or start a thread in the writing forum? Let me know.

Intellectual property is a minefield. However I'd imagine that the SPL will 'own' copyright on all of the games played in their competition, no matter who played in them. Interestingly neither Hamilton or Dunfermline have footage on their website from their time in the SPL. There will be an agreement in place for SPL clubs to use this footage. What charge, if any, there is for this will be known to all clubs concerned. The SPL will want a new agreement with Rangers to use this. I'm guessing they are going to say the previous agreement was with the 'old' Rangers company or something like that. I'd be very surprised if any court would accept that Rangers 'own' that footage though. It's petty though, but hey, we realised that a while ago.

Hang about, is this widely known? Any chance you could expand on the 'politics' bit please? Oh, and very belated well done!