26th of foot

John Reid.

I support D'Art's decision to cease posting on FF. Each to their own and we all arrive at conclusions from different ways and means. After several years of constant posting on FF, I decided to refrain five years past. The majority of that decision resided in my resignation from the RST Board. However, I advocated persistently that open debate always made us(the Rangers support) stronger. The guillotine is utilised too soon and too often on FF. Arms from the armoury, eggs from the eggery, and bootnecks arrive at the solution five years after the Paras.

Misinformation and disinformation. You have got to admire handing 'the research' to former Rangers News journo, Stephen Halliday. It will lend it more cache!

It's close season and for Hootsmon Tom et al, it's the trials of Sisyphus. It was defiance, now we are being duped, and next year it will be robotic responses devoid of the realities of Stockbridge. Tom cannot explain what he does not understand. His close season utterances appear defiant, maybe an attempt to dupe, and heading towards robotic in tone. Let's hope one of these close seasons, that boulder tumbles back down the hill and rolls over poor Tom. It's all too much of a burden.

The real truth of such an a satirical piece is that bits of it will be lifted and included in both print and broadcast media. Those that hate the club and the support want it to be true, need it to be true to justify and perpetuate the hate. Three decades past, I listened to a late night radio interview with Lionel Blue(prominent Rabbi) ; he was asked how 6 million Jews met their demise in gas chambers? His reply was unexpected to the interviewer, "if you have a catechism for a millennium that begins who killed Christ, the Jews killed Christ ........". Posterity will not be kind to the usual suspects.

TomBhoy is just another upper middle class prig in the offices of the Hootsmon. It's crowded, Aidan Smith remains Lord Snooty. They do all their cerebral jogging on the cobbles of Stockbridge, attempting to acquire working class credibility to lend weight to their musings. A Hootsmon Saturday is picking up le Jambonneau avec moutard a le marche de Sockbridge , Nip over to le chateau de Tyne and morph into le jammie jambo, Hearty Harry. A tout de suite spin to the Grange, jam in the last hour's play. Aidan and Tom are today's Mr Ben.

I am abroad at the moment and habitually I listen to the BBC World Service. Often, there are compilations of broadcasts or summaries from journos on various current affairs, politics, sports, ...... etc. Anyways, last weekend I heard Tom English spend several minutes pleading Hearts as a special case. He was urging the SPL to find a way to accommodate Hearts. He acknowledged what he was pleading would not play well with Rangers supporters, and exacerbated his plea by utilising the Rangers scenario as the way NOT to go, "we can see what a disaster for the game that's been". I suspect the Hootsman might be about to lead the charge to save Hertz?

I am a product of my conditioning, fight the battles you can win. Rangers are NOT fit enough to fight most battles with any chance of winning. Mather appears to have carried out an objective appreciation of the current situation. However, I would like to see the club single out an opportunity, one of the usual suspects imbued with Hubris. Draw him out and publically cut his legs off. Maybe even bayonet the cnut, pull the pin on a white phosphorous grenade and sit it on his chest, pump a whole magazine of 7.62mm into the burning, bleeding torso, ..................................... etc In Antibes, it is 25 degrees, I am contemplating grilled sardines and a bottle of petit gris. I am chilled.

Be fair, the last time I was in the principality, Gio made it a night to remember. Arrived in Nice, will head towards Monaco on Tuesday. I need to purchase a spear gun as old goggle-eyes is a bit of a slippery fish. I suspect this might be a Clouseau/Cousteau affair? Cue groaning saxophone of the Pink Panther ....................................

Currently, I am in Carcassonne. It's been raining for two days and the wind howls. The l'Aude is in spate and the Canal de Midi is bursting it's banks. I have decided to decamp to the only part of France with expected weather for this time of year, Cote d'Azur. A week in Antibes is the very thing. As Monaco is five minutes up the coast, I thought I would look up wee Craigy. We have a lot in common, both Lanarkshire lads, both former share holders in Rangers, and ............ err, that's it. However, fellow Gersnetters, I am prepared to treat Craig to a salade Nicoise and a glass or two of Provence rose before I offer him a few firm held opinions. If any of the contributors would like me to offer their firmly held opinions to Craig, please chime in. I know, I know, I am frustrated by the poor weather and am attempting to cheer myself up by (brow)beating wee Craigy. I admit it but it would be poor form NOT to take advantage of proximity. Thus, anyone know where Craig's gaffe is in Monaco?

Currently in France and drinking Pelforth. Been in California on several occasions and agree Anchor Steam(Wholefoods in Giffnock stock it) is a tasty beer but I prefer Sierra Nevada Pale Ale and Alaska beer brewed in Juno, seriously refreshing. Attended NARSA in San Francisco 6-7 years past and participated in the march over the Golden Gates bridge, a magnificent sight of celebrating Bears. A couple of guys from the local RSC told me they celebrated Helicopter Sunday by the whole club unloading from the bar on to a cable car, just to do the bouncy on the journey over the hill.

Currently in France and drinking Pelforth. Been in California on several occasions and agree Anchor Steam(Wholefoods in Giffnock stock it) is a tasty beer but I prefer Sierra Nevada Pale Ale and Alaska beer brewed in Juno, seriously refreshing. Attended NARSA in San Francisco 6-7 years past and participated in the march over the Golden Gates bridge, a magnificent sight of celebrating Bears. A couple of guys from the local RSC told me they celebrated Helicopter Sunday by the whole club unloading from the bar on to a cable car, just to do the bouncy on the journey over the hill.

As stated, at the culmination of nine-in-a-row(97), Rangers were £18million in the black. During his tenure at ra Stydome, Big Pierre Van Pink Ribbon was too busy servicing his bhoyfriend, the chef at the Point Hotel, East Kilbride.

Clowns to the left of us, jokers to the right, here we(the support) are, stuck in the middle. I am off to France for a month tomorrow, both the wine and the pastis will be consumed until I achieve a feeling of immense well being.

Like the Rangers Tax Case Blog before, the purpose of Charlotte Fakes is to provide a daily crib sheet for our objective broadcast and print media to chorus from, it has set an agenda and intends to maintain a grip on the ongoing situation. As for identity, I suspect it will be BBC Scotland's Chris McLaughlin as link to Craig Whyte. McLaughlin picks the cherries for broadcast and distributes the rest to fellow Rangers hating cohorts.

Reference the back four, everyone to the right of Lee Wallace must be replaced. Attributes required are commanding and competence.

I'll tell you where the club goes from here, in the immediate short term anyways. Get the fcuking season ticket renewal letters out, like yesterday. At least remove one piece of unnecessary uncertainty.

I am a liberal apolitical type of Bear. Reference Whyte, let's just assemble a firing squad. I will help provide the necessary two minutes training; chamber a round, present the weapon, and squeeze the trigger. Oh, and am prepared to initiate the correspondence to recover the cost of empty cases from his family. If said family cannot meet the cost, I'm all for bayoneting the cnut. Next?

The internecine strife that has plagued our club these last few years, has seen all the main players adopt a pet journo(s) in both broadcast and print media. Getting your side of the story out there fastest and most often is an absolute requirement. Simply, they are all at it. BBC Scotland has proved most adept at continually destabilising our club by constant ridicule of whoevers' hand is on the tiller. After resignation, they go back and put the comforting arm around whatever character and utilise as a source of further mischief. Green is feeling the comfort of Chris McLaughlin at this moment, in a few months time, it will be Malcolm Murray. It is perpetual, the story that keeps on giving.

You missed the game? Poor excuse, unforgiveable.

I was in the Boys' Enclosure that day. DJ's header hit the near post, ran along the line and hit the far post, before big Tam studded the ball over the line. The scene around me was the Bouncy(before the Bouncy had been introduced). Fellow Bears celebrating twice before exploding in relief.

The last time I saw Rangers lift the Reserve League Cup would be almost two decades past. It was a wet and windy evening at old Douglas Park where Rangers triumphed 3-1 after extra time over the Accies. I seem to remember Brian McGinty scored two that night.

I suspect Traynor's job is very much dependent upon who he pays direct responsibility to, ie who is tasking him each day? Further, the amount of incoming at Rangers would not allow him to get his head up and survey the situation. Fifteen years past, Rangers hired the Daily Record's then Chief Political reporter, Paul Sinclair to be Rangers PRO, he lasted less than a year. The Sun's Iain King also spent less than a year as the club's Head of Communications. I suspect Traynor's tenure to be similar.

There should be discounts available to those of us who attended his debut. Sandy was known in those days as, 'Young Billy Jardine'.

My ghast is flabbered. I wonder what will become of his 8%? Let's confirm all those prejudices and appoint David Longmuir.